Great Big Ones

Stephen Colbert has the largest cajones of any major comedian working today. He was named one of Time magazine's 100 most influential people -- for the second time, as he lets everyone know at the official event. An excerpt:

Of course, all of us should be honored to be listed on the TIME 100 alongside the two men who will be slugging it out in the fall: President Obama, and the man who would defeat him, David Koch.

Give it up everybody. David Koch.

Little known fact -- David, nice to see you again, sir.

Little known fact, David's brother Charles Koch is actually even more influential. Charles pledged $40 million to defeat President Obama, David only $20 million. That's kind of cheap, Dave.

Sure, he's all for buying the elections, but when the bill for democracy comes up, Dave's always in the men's room. I'm sorry, I must have left Wisconsin in my other coat.

I was particularly excited to meet David Koch earlier tonight because I have a Super PAC, Colbert Super PAC, and I am -- thank you, thank you -- and I am happy to announce Mr. Koch has pledged $5 million to my Super PAC. And the great thing is, thanks to federal election law, there's no way for you to ever know whether that's a joke.

By the way, if David Koch likes his waiter tonight, he will be your next congressman.

Great huge brass ones.

Read it all.

President Slow Jam

The night Willard Mitt Romney "clinches" the GOP nomination, Barack Hussein Obama goes on TV with a message about pending student loan interest rate legislation:

It's interesting that this appearance with Jimmy Fallon reminded me so much of when President Barack Obama announced the assassination of Osama bin Laden, particularly his walk back from the podium (now with grunge guitar):

Cool is cool.

Hard to imagine Willard Mitt doing either appearance as well.

Uncool.

Bullshit Candidate

If there was ever any -- any -- remaining doubt that Mitt Romney is a joke candidate with no core convictions (other than love and respect of wealth), then this statement from his campaign spokesperson, Eric Fehrnstrom, has made it clear that he's the emptiest of empty suits:

Is it a gaffe if all you're doing is revealing the truth behind your campaign curtain?

I think this one is going to stick, especially coming on the heels of a big Primary win (Illinois) and repeating his snatch-defeat-from-victory pattern of following wins with gaffe's. There's already a website up with Mitt's Etch-a-Sketch position changes -- just click on the words to see yet another example. Both Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich brandished an Etch-a-Sketch today, and the political ads just write themselves.

Here's Romney (a terrible candidate to begin with) trying to put the genie back in the bottle later in the day:

You have to bet that his approval ratings will fall further, and maybe this is the big opening that Santorum needs to scoop Romney in the upcoming state contests.

BTW, I love the Etch-a-Sketch product and have since childhood. I love that it's been owned by the same company that created it for over 50 years. I love the statement they put out today and, most of all, hope their sales rocket skyward...as the Romney campaign tumbles towards hell.

A Tale of Bart and Homer

Game of Thrones fever hits Springfield:

To watch more, visit tag

Doh! is coming.

It's That Time Again

Yes:



Happy Holidays!

Obama vs. MItt

Willard Mitt Romney, born 1947, would be a generation shift as President from Barack Hussein Obama, who was born in 1961. From Gen-Between to Baby Boomer again, 64 years old to Obama's 50. And it is increasing looking like he'll be Obama's opponent next November.

The GOP always gives it to the next guy in line, and it's Mitt. He ran last time, is less robotic this time, seasoned, has the Bush establishment behind him that's run the Party for so long. He's making his own luck -- making more ludicrous candidates who keep popping up make fools of themselves by standing his ground letting them self-destruct.

The latest is Texas Governor Rick Perry, who's been arrogant in lack of debate preparation and made some odd mistakes with the base on immigration, where I'm actually in some agreement with the candidate. Now he's in apology mode, which could be his death spiral.

And out of nowhere, last weekend's Florida Straw Poll winner, Herman "Godfather Pizza" Cain, is saying that's why he can't support Perry if he does win the nomination. Now Mitt is suddenly up over Perry in Florida Republican Primary polling. It's starting to look a whole lot like McCain's >>grumble grumble base<< march to nomination victory.

I'm wondering if Perry could become damaged goods as even a VP choice for Mitt.

Anthony's Weiner

It looks like the bus is coming for Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY), as more and more Dem leaders bail on him in light of increased penile exposure.

All I can think of is Borat:



So my country can be free.

Just Funny

With Nightmare Sarah coming back to suck some air out of the room, it might just be better to laugh, absurdly:

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis: Will Ferrell from Will Ferrell

PS: Good movies: Bridesmaids, Midnight in Paris, Hanna, 13 Assassins, Cave of Forgotten Dreams, Double Hour, Fast Five (guilty pleasure).

Seth Meyers was funny, but Obama killed!

Yes, I stole that joke in the title from Stephen Colbert's opening last night. And Colbert also highlighted this awesome clip from the White House Press Correspondent's Dinner this past Saturday night:



Meyers was actually very funny and got a good dig on President Obama being unbeatable by any other candidate in 2012...except 2008's Barack Obama. The whole act:



Best of all, with 6.2 million views and counting, Comedian-in-Chief (with a complete evisceration of Donald Trump):



Not quite as gratifying as his TV appearance late Sunday night, of course.

Larry Wilmore Kills It in DC

Long overdue recognition for stand-up, writer and senior black correspondent Larry Wilmore who is very, very funny at Wednesday night's Congressional Correspondents' Dinner. Love the Obama jokes he justifies by saying, "He's not here, right?" and the Martin Luther King joke:



Funny, funny on race, taboo stuff for the room. Another triumph for the Jon Stewart political comedy brand, like when Stephen Colbert jet-fueled his career at the White House Press Correspondents' Dinner.

Done

Peaked:

From Russia With Gov

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog</a> The Daily Show on Facebook

Thanks to Tucson, everyone now knows she's on the grift. Aside from her hardcore marks, her rubs, but anyone with half a brain is keeping their money away from her.

Final Verdict on Ricky Gervais

The best piece on last night's Golden Globe Awards today is, unsurprisingly, Pete Hammond in Nikki Fink's Deadline. As The Social Network solidified it's leading candidate status, along with Colin Firth, Christian Bale, arguably Natalie Portman and Melissa Leo, the only thing anyone talked about was returning host Ricky Gervais:

From inside the Beverly Hilton International ballroom, jaded journalists at my table in the back seemed genuinely shocked at just how far host Ricky Gervais went to insult the organization he was working for, not to mention everyone else in the room. It was as edgy a performance as these things can possibly be and, like him or not, it kept your attention. Ryan Gosling told me it seemed "like David Lynch was directing the show". I thought it refreshing to see someone go so un-PC on NBC.

The President of the Golden Globes even threatened his host's career:

"Ricky will not be invited back to host the show next year, for sure," the HFPA member said. "For sure any movie he makes he can forget about getting nominated. He humiliated the organization last night and went too far with several celebrities whose representatives have already called to complain."

Eventually he corrected that, as I'm sure calls were made by representation, but the final verdict is exactly what this commenter, skd, says on another Deadline post:

The Golden Globes went from an irrelevant awards show with questionable methods of choosing winners, to a major hit (17 million viewers on the deadest night of the week, Sunday!?). Yeah maybe the HFPA and NBC will grumble within earshot of those who were grilled last night, but privately they are jumping for joy. In the age of cable tv, you got to push the envelope…hard, or you will be irrelevant, boring and without viewers. No one was going to watch the Golden Globes, until Twitter and Facebook came alive 15 minutes into the show. You can’t buy that kind of PR.

Exactly. Makes Gervais look like some kind of genius.

Who can do whatever he wants.

Insulting

The GOP started their new run in the House by reading their own bowdlerized version the U.S. Constitution, for example conveniently leaving out slavery, much as their core constituency wants to believe slavery had little to do with the Civil War.

When they read the section on having to be born in America to become President they got interrupted -- a birther screamed to Jesus before being arrested by Capitol Police.

The GOP had two members vote illegally, i.e. not officially sworn in, and asked for permission from ex-Speaker Nancy Pelosi to keep the votes in the record.

Their next big media event is a vote, without debate, to repeal the historic healthcare reform enacted this past session under Democratic leadership. Odd choice if they're really fiscal conservatives, as it will add $230 billion to the deficit and leave 17 million Americans uninsured, i.e. just like before reform passage.

They're claiming any new programs have to be offset by an equal amount to spending cuts, yet have exempted tax cuts from their proposed rule, as if they are magic beans. Yep, more deficit. Like they gave America with the Bush tax cuts they all voted for.

New House Speaker John Boehner (R-OH) is already backtracking on his party's promise to reduce spending by $100 billion this year.

And Rep. Darrel Issa (CA-R) has had to backtrack wildly from calling Obama "the most corrupt President", saying a day later he meant the Administration, not the President himself, and again today backing further by saying he meant "corrupt like a computer." WTF are you saying, Darrel? Awesome session start for you, sir.

Awesome session start for all these clowns.

At a time like this, there's only one thing to do:



(Groucho and Eddie Murphy rule.)

Behind the Col-Mask

Stephen Colbert lays it all out in reddit, answering questions from that audience thanks to a promise he made if the site raise over a half million dollars for DonorChoose.

It's a pleasure to learn about the guy, his method, his training, his doubts. This one is my fave answer:

When you are young and single, there really isnt anything to worry about.

Will you starve? Not likely. I worried that I didnt have enough gumption to get work. That I wouldn't know how to network or something. But at a young age several people, some professors and directors, told me I had talent, and that it was mine to husband if I was willing to work. Those kind words sustained me, many times.

I mostly just said yes to any opportunity to get on stage. Pay or no pay. Equity, amateur, comedy, avant garde, and improv especially. Chicago has a great improv community, and I could get up on stage a lot after I got to know the other members of the community. I called it getting in trouble. You say yes to something, then you are in trouble. You have to deliver. Each mini-crisis I forced myself into made me work hard.

As for true doubt, it got under my skin deeply only once. I was newly-married and I was offered a part I would have loved, but no pay. I had worked for six years doing anything, but had made a deal with myself that if I ever was to have family I could support, I would have to insist on pay. A small rule, right? But hard for a young actor to keep. Mostly you don't really get paid.

I said no to the part and immediately (I mean within minutes) went into a spiral of panic that lasted for months. I was sure I had made the wrong decision (I hadn't) and would never get a part like it again. But the worst feeling was that I knew I truly wanted to be an actor and there was no turning back now. I was too old to do anything else. This was a feeling I wouldn't wish on anyone.

Yep, Stephen Colbert once again proving himself a man of his word -- and a man of the people.

Tron Lebowskis

Upcoming flavor:



Retro:



The Dude abides. Even in nanospace. Again.

Extreme Promo

Is TBS building up more than Conan can deliver? If they can capture some of the freedom and energy of his promos, they win. This one, for example -- the hardest thing to do is make big explosions and fx funny, but I laughed with this:

Here's hoping that Conan O'Brien's move to TBS turns out to be the smartest move he could have made and points the way to the future of late night talk.

Heroes Stewart and Colbert excepted, of course.

Easy One

Conan is funny. I hope he keeps the beard:



He's unleashed. Hope he takes it somewhere special.

They're Back

Is there something wrong with me, that the only movie I'm really looking forward to is this?:



Can it possibly be as funny, dare I pray funnier, than the last one?

Ahead of Everyone

As good as it gets (1936):



And better (1940):

Sociopathic Narcissism

My father used to say that you had to be at least slightly crazy to want to be President. That may go for other office-seekers as well:



Vote Clint Webb this November!