Roast Gonzo

The appearance of Attorney General Alberto Gonzales before the Senate Judiciary Committee will go down as the most humiliating such testimony by an appointee to that office in the history of our United States.

Don't take my word for it -- there's plenty of clips collected on TPMmuckraker where, under damning questioning by both Democratic and Republican Senators, Gonzales makes a fool of himself and a mockery of the great office he holds. Personal favorites:

Sen. Russ Feingold (D-WI) coolly takes Gonzales apart over his inability to say who drew up the list of Federal Prosecutors to fire.

Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) throws Gonzales under a bus.

Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-CA) takes Gonzales apart over he so-called reasons for firing Carol Lam, who was following up on convicted GOP Congressman Randall "Duke" Cunningham's corruption connections.

Sen. Tom Coburn (R-OK) tells Gonzales to resign.

Sen. Charles Schumer (D-NY) tells Gonzales to resign.

Sen. Arlen Specter (R-PA) tells Gonzales to consider resigning, and if he chooses to stay for his boss to consider firing him.

There were protesters in the hearing as well, one actually keeping track of the number of times Gonzales responded to a question with, "I don't recall." At the end of the hearing, "protesters began singing 'Hey, hey, goodbye' from the 1970s hit song by Steam."

Per The New York Times editorial on Friday, "Mr. Gonzales came across as a dull-witted apparatchik incapable of running one of the most important departments in the executive branch."

There's the rub. As an apparatchik, a political hack, he serves one master, a guy who is more likely to keep him the more he is told to let him go. Per Glenn Greenwald in Salon:

This President does not fire people under pressure. When political pressures are exerted on Bush, he does the opposite of what is demanded of him -- for no reason except to defy the requests of others...

...Bush fires those who are disloyal. Those who are subservient and loyal are never fired, no matter their level of incompetence or corruption...

...That is how Bush works. If someone demands that Bush take action, he will petulantly refuse simply to demonstrate that he does not comply with anyone else's will. He is The Decider, nobody else, and nothing is more important than for him to demonstrate that.

As a reminder of the level of quality in this boss of bosses who holds Alberto's pink slip in his hands, here's your President speaking today, stumbling in front of a hand-picked audience while Gonzo fried. Best quote from his disconcertingly disconnected ramble:

"There are jobs Americans aren't doing. ... If you've got a chicken factory, a chicken-plucking factory, or whatever you call them, you know what I'm talking about."

There's an old saying about hiring people for a job. It goes, "A's hire A's and B's hire C's," meaning that the best people are smart enough to know they should hire the best people, while the mediocre, either mistakenly or by fear of being overshadowed, hire worse workers.

So who do C's hire?


Crossposted to The Daily Reel.